My Journey.

Although our journeys start when we are children, its during our teenage years when our emotions really become apparent and start to shape our future. Maybe your teenage years were happy, and lack of confidence in yourself came later in your life. But for many women, their teenage years are when their confidence went and low self-esteem came to visit. If you allow it, it will stay forever, meaning uncertainty in yourself will always try to find its way back.

Years passed, and although I got the job ahead of so many applicants that I trained for at college, my confidence and low-self esteem demons were back. I decided the best option for me was to get married and settle down. So at 19, that’s what I did.

My life was a happy one blessed with six amazing children who kept me busy and very happy.

But confidence was still a big problem.

Finding out about an affair in my early 30s changed my world. A black hole was looming. When you have no confidence in yourself and then devastation arrives in your life, your days are long and bleak.

Coming home one particular day from the school playground, where the whispering and gossip were particularly tough, made me cry for hours. I decided the only thing to do was lock myself in the house and never go out again. Later that night, looking through old photos, I came across cards and messages from friends and photographs of me and my loved ones. The messages and the fun portrayed in the photographs made me remember a short time living in another part of the world, memories of my life with my family. Where was this girl now?

The next few days were spent thinking about all the years that had already past, now gone forever.

My children made me so happy, but one day they would be living their own lives

I thought long and hard about what I really wanted from life. But thinking and doing are not the same thing. So at first I did what so many of us do, I sat just thinking about what I really wanted. That thinking went on for many, many months.

Eventually I realised that what I really wanted was fulfilment and to live a meaningful life. And the only person who could make that happen was me.

But where do you start. Who can help and guide you.

So I read lots of books, went on many courses and listened to people who had changed their lives. slowly from courage, hard work and a new belief in myself….…positive thinking became a new way of life for me.

Most people, when they’re younger, believe money brings you happiness. What actually brings you real lasting happiness is finding your real self-the real you and then your life will bring you what you want. Inside of me was the real me………she just needed a chance to get out.

Life is very precious—don’t just make this one of those things you say. In our lifetime, we will have s**t awful days, but when you gain confidence in yourself, you will survive them. Now I am living the life I have always wanted. Happy, loved, appreciated, doing a job I love and doing something every so often to change my life in some small way. All this from confidence in myself. For many years with my support and guidance, men and woman of all ages have been finding the real them. Finding this will change and enhance your life. Confidence in yourself is all you need.

I would like to share with you how my life changed. Most of you will know that surviving your children’s teenage and young adult years can be a big challenge. So with a different approach I was able to help my children as well as learn from them. It had always been my dream to go to college when my children were older………so at 46, I applied and my dreams started. This then made it possible for me to go to university at the age of 48. Starting a career at 50, what a great feeling! Alongside this, my own business took off—although this was more of a hobby for many years.

My new-found confidence gave me the courage to discuss with my husband our failing marriage. This was hard for many reasons, one of course being my children and family. I was now in my 50s, finding myself again at another crossroads. You can imagine how scary that felt.. Once you find the real you with open eyes, you realise some things need to change for everyone’s happiness. Although it was not easy, we all survived the divorce. Then after a period of time, I ventured on to the dating scene. This at any age is a hard thing to do. Although I laugh now about my lack of experience the experience I gained helps so many of my clients. Best of all It is where I found true love.

I am not a counsellor or psychologist. I am a life coach and woman who, through my own actions, took herself in a new direction, finding happiness, love, peace, a career that I love, new adventures and an understanding of how to look and feel good in my clothes and makeup. Finding the real me means I will have no regrets at the end of my days.

Before I finish my story I would like to share with you surviving the hardest and most heart-breaking challenge I will ever face, the sudden death of my son Michael. He died just aged 21 from Sudden Adult Death Syndrome. A young man who lived life with humour, kindness, love and confidence always believing in himself.

Finding myself and, my new love of life has given me the strength to survive and live with this total heartbreak.